So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Randomize