I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
So many bounce houses so little time
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize
