garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
