Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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