Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Randomize