I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Is it because I queefed?
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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