just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
