I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Randomize
