I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
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