i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
