I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
