then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
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