marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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