god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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