You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
