her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
