I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize