he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
cat food counts as protein by the way
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
