So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize