My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
