the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
