The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
ttyl tear gas
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize