HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Randomize
