she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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