I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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