I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
