Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
