lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
