We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize