He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
