so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
