nut hugger
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
