You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
