talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
