im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
