Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize
