i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
