no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
