Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize