yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
how drunk are you?
Several
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
