Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Randomize
