....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
