At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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