Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
