you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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