Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
my sisters under your porch take her home
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Randomize
