He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
