And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Randomize
