Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Randomize
