Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
